The Aussie mens bringing home bronze in the 4x200m relay has tied up an incredible haul of medals from our Olympians today.

Starting with gold in both the mens and womens rowing, which was followed by the Tassie Terminator muscling home another gold in the 200 freestyle.

With the gold medal count now at 5, this has been the most exciting day of the Olympics yet – and there’s only more to come.

That’s why it’s probably no surprise today that Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing has decided to pop his head up in between these events to hold a press conference that nobody knew about, or watching.

With Sydney still in lockdown for the foreseeable future, The Prime Minister’s Office gave 28 minutes warning that a press conference was going to take place out front of his luxury tax-payer-funded residence at Kirribilli House.

It was very clever timing for the Prime Minister to announced boosts to his already extremely complicated disaster payments, which has seen hundreds of thousands of working Australians slipping through the cracks.

In case you missed it, because the Prime Minister wants to save money by ensuring you aren’t across these announcements for support that was never offered to Victoria, the new NSW disaster payments have increased to $750 a week for people who have lost most of their work, and $450 for those who have lost some of it.

People already receiving welfare payments such as youth allowance or a carers payment will also be able to claim disaster payments for the first time, but don’t rush or anything.

As Sydney breaks another record with daily transmissions, Scotty is hoping the our Olympians can continue to keep up the good work, so that no one asks him anymore questions about the role he has played in this economic disaster.

With the Olympic silveware piling up, Scotty From Marketing has been able to avoid anymore questions about his decision to undermine public trust in the jabs with his bullshit bloodclot fear-mongering aimed at making young people wait for another option.

He also doesn’t have to explains why he keeps avoiding taking responsibility for building Federal Quarantine facilities out the back of the Toowoomba International Airport – where local business leaders have been shovel ready since December.


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