WE POINT THE FINGER AT DAN, REMEMBER? Scotty From Marketing has come out again today to make a mess of public health recommendations, in an effort to generate some better numbers for his pathetic jab roll out.

After already encouraging young people to take the AZ jab that health experts had asked them not, the PM has today suggested they speed up the program by only waiting eight weeks between shots – rather than waiting the recommended 12 weeks.

Morrison has also been caught out today lying about securing a “game-changing deal” to triple Australia’s access to the other german-made jabs that he hasn’t publicly undermined with all of his fear-mongering about blood clots.

However, the pharmaceutical giant that makes the Pfeiffer jabs says there is no change in the number of doses the company has contracted to deliver to Australia over 2021 – contradicting Morrison’s glorious announcements.

The part-time Prime Minister has popped his head up again today to to hand-feed NewsCorp with warped stats that imply that the jab roll-out is accelerating.

The PM’s comments came ahead of New South Wales confirming 44 new cases.

Unfortunately for him, the NSW Health contact tracing and test results are delivering hard numbers that cannot be twisted to make everyone feel better about the fact that we have one of the most incompetent world leaders overseeing our journey out of this nightmare.

The fact that the NSW Premier is making no effort to cover his back in her daily press conferences is also bad news for Scotty, who was hoping his colleagues in the state government would help him in his efforts to get re-elected again.

“Gladys, bub” Morrison was overhead telling the Premier this morning.

“Look, I know it’s bad outlook right now, with all of the ethnics spreading the virus around like baklava at a wog wedding”

“But can you please just stop pointing to my government. I didn’t blame you when you let half the continent light on fire in 2019”

“Remember the memo… We don’t blame each other”

“You, me and Murdoch point the finger at Andrews if we have to.”

“… and as we learnt last week… just leave Annastacia alone because we know she fires shots back”


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here