A combination of elite North Sydney private schools have today come out and apologise for the hand they have played in producing some of the biggest offenders in the current inquiry into banks and financial services firms.

It marks the second Royal Commission that rattles the core of the Liberal Party due to it’s direct links to some of the most nepotistic and elite men’s only networks in Australia.

“Sorry. Shit of course this was going to fall onto us” said Hugo Griffintley-Whytebough, spokesman for the prominent ex-private school old boy group The Representative Institution Of Childhoods Only at Elite Education (RICHBOEES).

“We are sorry for this”

“At least you can’t blame us for the Don Dale Royal Commission. That’s some low level family ruining crime”

This comes at the bank end of the Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Abuse, which also saw their exclusive institutions to blame for a fair chunk of the misconduct, but mainly their educators, as opposed to students.

The banking royal commission was established in late December, after years of public pressure from whistleblowers, consumer groups, the Greens, Labor, and some Nationals MPs.

Its first public hearings began on 13 March, and they will run at irregular intervals through 2018.

The royal commission has been asked to investigate whether any of the silvertail mates of Tony Abbott’s working at Australia’s financial services entities have engaged in misconduct, and if criminal or other legal proceedings should be referred to the commonwealth.



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