With it more clear than ever that the culture of the Canberra bubble is in serious need of a retcon, the big guns have asked Red Frogs to come in and consult with Parliament House staff.

Founded in 1997, Red Frogs are a volunteer group founded by a youth pastor, known for frequenting schoolies and o-week type events, ensuring that innebrients have access to sobering resources such as donuts, ice blocks and Christ.

An elite group of the most fiercely disciplined Red Frogs have now descended on Parliament House determined to be part of the event and making sure that people do the right thing.

“Maybe instead of using a prayer room to have sex with your staff you could use it for…prayer?” suggested one young Red Frog who due to COVID has not had a chance to build a single orphanage. 

“Here’s an icey pole.”

Unconfirmed reports state there has been growing tension between the Red Frogs and several MPs, including Nationals MP George Christianson who shoulder charged several members of the volunteer group when he could smell donuts.

“Where are they? Why aren’t there more!?”


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