Just when we thought things couldn’t get any worse for the Member Of New England, administrators for the controversial Armidale Buy/Swap/Sell page say he’s been scouring their Facebook group for a free ride back to Parliament House.

This follows the news that Barnaby Joyce is doing it rather tough, claiming that a $200,000 plus salary doesn’t go very far when you’re supporting two families.

Joyce says he has even taken to slaughtering his own farm animals, living without a dishwasher, and buying a single coffee per day as a result of having a Catholic amount of kids in a relatively rural area.

He has also been forced to wear his older cousins hand-me-downs, and is now desecrating his government car with ethanol-infused unleaded.

The experience, Joyce said, has given him an insight into how tough those living on Newstart — who receive around $250 a a week — must be doing it.

“Running a car is hard enough in the bush” he says.

“But with 6 kids, two missos and an undying love for choccy milk – you’d be flat out getting to and from Canberra without a bit of help”

And by a bit of help, Joyce means a free ride from a local ANU student named Braiden, who has a spare seat in his 2004 Camry back to Canberra, after spending the weekend at his mother’s place in Armidale for her birthday.

“I’ve dehydrated some of this mutton” says Barnaby.

“It goes beautifully with a bit of tom sauce and and some white bread.”

“Oh sick. You’ve got a CD drive. Let’s get some Hutchence banging”

At time of press Barnaby was seen telling Braiden that he wasn’t that hungry while in the Drive-Thru at Merriwa maccas.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here