ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The New South Wales Health Minister told journalists this morning that they need to build a bridge and get over the fact that a bunch of private schoolboys got the precious Michelle Pfeiffer jab because it’s already happened and he doesn’t have a time machine to go back and stop it from happening.

“It happened, get over it,” said Brad Hazzard.

“What do you want me to do? Suck the serum out of their arms and spit it into the veins of an aged care worker? Get real.”

Mr Hazzard’s response to the journalist’s question regarding what happened with students from prominent Sydney boarding school St Joseph’s College getting the jump on front line workers wasn’t dissimilar to that of his colleagues.

Premier Gladys Berejiklian rolled her eyes and cough-laughed when another journalist brought it up.

“Look, I hate the little cunts that dribble out of these schools as much as the next woman,” she said.

“But they provide my government with young staff. I mean, there are children of high-level federal politicians working here in my government. Most in their early 20s’. Most are senior advisors. What do they advise my government on? What it’s like to be some cunt’s son who’s never had and probably never will have to try? Well, that’s all most of them know,”

“Anyway, you people have to learn that things like this are just part-and-parcel of modern Australian life. There are those who have and those who have not. The ones that have will get special access to jabs so they can go eat squid on the fucking Amalfi Coast or something. The ones that don’t have will just have to eat shit and die,”

“Did that answer your question?”

The journalist nodded and put her hand down.

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here