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With both the Sydney property and rental market dip to what some economists describe as a normal levels, one Harbourside real estate agent is now facing the terrifying prospect of having to do some fucking work.

56-year-old Bon Dyer says he only started wearing non-collared shirts with a jacket after his divorce, but his smart-casual dress sense hasn’t ever been an issue for him – because he’s always been on the right side of the rental application.

Not as the owner of course, as the middle-man between the owner and applicant, the bloke that just has to open a door and play on his phone for 45 minutes before some stupid prick commits themselves to either 6 or 12 months of financial entrapment. Bon actually chooses to privately lease his own investment properties.

But this week he’s noticed a very concerning change.

Applicant after applicant are walking through his inspections without even shaking his hand. All of them are underdressed, and one was even wearing thongs.

This is because unlike Bon, young people looking to rent in the capital cities actually keep a close eye on the markets – and after seeing it drop considerably over the last few weeks – they’ve realised they don’t need to suck his dick anymore.

Faced with this disgraceful display of insolence from the plebeian renters, Bon has had to seriously reevaluate his career.

For the time being he’s going to try his hand at an online course on sales techniques – but if that doesn’t work – he might have to find another industry.

“Pharmaceuticals are pretty hot right now” he said.

“The young people are always very polite when trying to get their hands on some of them”

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