ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

If you talk to Jayden Carter, Lithgow man Kane Willis is a ‘putrid dog’ that talks shit behind Jayden’s back.

If you ask Kane Willis the same question about Jayden, the out-of-work gyprocker says he’s a ‘snake’ who only looks out for himself.

Earlier this morning, the pair were spotted at the Bathurst Skate Park on the banks of the once-mighty Macquarie River trying to work out their difference and to settle once and for all which town had the best McDonald’s restaurant.

“It’s fucking Bathurst, mate. We’ve got two, one in Kelso, bras,” said Carter as he waved a trolley pole in Kane’s face.

“Fuck off you putrid dog, you’re lying cunt. Lithgow has the highest-trafficked McDonalds in like the whole of the area you fuck head. Higher volume means fresher produce, ya fucking cunt,” said Kane.

“I’ll fucking knock your head off you fucking bitch.”

Both Kane and Jayden then noticed one of our reporters taking pictures of the exchange, to which they both said to ‘take a picture because it’ll last longer.’

However, despite both warring factions threatening each other with razor scooters, box cutters and their bikie affiliations, the confrontation turned physical.

In the ensuing scuffle, Kane lost one of his Etnie sneakers and Jayden had both of his spacer earrings ripped out. Kane’s brother, Greighaym, clocked Jayden’s cousin in the forehead with a Dan Murphey’s trolley pole, causing him to drop and fit violently at the bottom of the skate bowl while skateboards were thrown around like startled seagulls.

Moments later, police arrived to break the brawl up and arrested Kane and Jayden for affray.

However, the question still remains as to which town has the best McDonalds.

More to come.


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