3 February, 2016. 11:23

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Peeling himself off the couch after a long day of watching Sky News, father-of-four Eoin McEuan was dragged to his local Thai joint by wife, Morag.

Meeting two of his boys there, the 69-year-old publically berated Morag for disagreeing with Peta Credlin’s opinion on the US election during the short walk where he parked, to the Bangkok Banana in East Betoota’s trendy Daroo St dining district.

Groaning and huffing to himself as he browsed the menu, McEuan slammed the plastic-sleeved sheets down and declared he was ready to order.

“Oi, Ping Pong. Get your arse over here, I’m ready to order,” he said after whistling at the waiter.

“I’ll have the Pad Moo Moo, or whatever the fuck it’s called. Don’t put any of that oriental spice in it, you’ll fuck my guts if you do.”

Another part of Morag died as he explained to the bemused Thai waiter that he’d like a mild Pad Kee Mao with chicken – and that she’ll have the Pad See Ew with duck.

Son Gavin laughed, as it’s the easiest way to disarm his father in situations. He spoke to The Advocate briefly after last night’s dinner to explain.

“Yeah look,” he said. “Like most property-owning white men of his vintage, he’s quite racist.”

“He watches a lot of Sky News, I think that might be a contributing factor to his deep-seeded loathing of Thai food, but we’ll just have to wait and see.”

The Advocate reached out to Eion for comment on his behaviour during last night’s dinner, but he just blew us a raspberry and pretended to masturbate.

More to come.




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