FRUITLESS POLICING: The former Premier Of NSW has today chortled to his colleagues over a long lunch on the Woolloomooloo wharves, after receiving a news update about his good mate Jamie’s casino.

It’s a new story that makes him giggle, in a naughty kind of way – as he relays the news to a table full of high-flyers.

As was the case during his time as premier, Baird only really surrounds himself white wine swishing finance types who carry a slight Christian edge to their moral superiority.

“Haha oh shit…” he says to the boys, as he shows them his phone.

“Have a go at this”

The breaking news that has them all chuckling surrounds the ruling that James Packer’s Crown Resorts have been found unsuitable to hold a casino licence at Barangaroo in Sydney.

The report written by former New South Wales supreme court judge, Patricia Bergin SC, said the evidence of money laundering, Crown’s cowboy operations in China which led to arrests of its staff in 2016, and possible organised crime links made the company and its controllers unsuitable.

As the story pinballs around the table down on the wharves today, Mike Baird is now pissing himself.

“Fuck me!!” he laughs.

“Can you believe that Jamie convinced me and the Libs to exploit the deaths of two little white boys in Kings Cross and shut down every pub and night club in the city – just so that he could funnel them into his Casino”

The news of Packer’s failed bid for a Casino licence comes after nearly 6 years of strict policing of young peoples behaviour in the retirement belt of Sydney’s inner-east, once the busiest nightlife destination in the Southern Hemisphere. Ironically, the news comes the same week as Hot Mess Gladys revealed her plans to repeal Baird’s legacy of Hillsong Sharia, also known as lock-out laws.

The nanny-state laws were first introduced in 2014 in what was purported to be a response to alcohol-fuelled violence, but was actually just an attempt to breath air into a manipulated Sydney property market and redirect foot traffic to Barangaroo.

“and now he’s not even gonna be able to get a license!” cackles Baird.


“Fuck I’m glad I got out of politics. Look at this binfire”



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