From players being stood down for fraternising with bikies outside of the COVID-bubble, to a mid-season resignation by the head coach, 2020 has not been the season for the Brisbane Broncos.

Without even playing last night, the Broncos relegated to last place on the NRL ladder, after the Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs’ surprise win over the Rabbitohs.

The Doggies scored almost more tries than they have all season in the 26-16 upset over South Sydney, which lifted them from 15th place and bumped the boys from Red Hill down to 16th.

This is the first time in rugby league history that the Brisbane club has sat last on the NRL ladder this close to the finals.

With their remaining chances of making the top eight vaporised several weeks ago, the Broncos are now playing for pride as they fight for one last win before Mad Monday, after enduring a never before seen slump in form.

Outside of flogging themselves to jag one much needed win against either Parramatta tonight, or the Cowboys next week – several other measures have been put in place to protect Brisbane’s self-esteem over the coming weeks.

A spokesperson for the club has today revealed that some of the most unhinged and volatile security bouncers from Brisbane’s Fortitude Valley nightlife precinct have been hired to provide 24-hour protection for the famous Wally Lewis statue outside Suncorp Stadium.

The bronze sculpture of ‘King Wally’ has been susceptible to vandalism in the past, with several jokers painting in completely blue during Queensland’s eight-in-a-row Origin domination.

“We will protect the statue of The King by any means necessary” said Broncos chairman Karl Morris.

“We’ve hired some extremely violent bouncers from The Valley. They will be providing security for the monument, day and night”

“The last thing we want is some expat taping a couple wooden spoons in his hands. We would hate that more than we would actually hate winning the wooden spoon”

“If, for we have to violate the COVID-bubble and send Fifita out there to bust some heads, we will”

“But, we have faith in the blokes we’ve hired. They used to work the door at Mustang bar haha”


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