Regional Boyfriend Sees No Issue With Bringing A King Brown To A Baby Shower
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTAs Bianka Carlton struggles to hike up a pair of stockings over her knees, a thought enters her tired, frustrated mind.
“I...
Bloke Slathers On Skincare With The Same Technique Mum Used To Put Sunscreen On Him As A Kid
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn some delightfully banal news, there may now be an actual reason why so many straight men apply their skincare with such...
Local Woman Now Cold Enough To Consider Relinquishing All Dignity And Getting An Oodie
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA woman who lives in the godless structure that is an Australian terrace house, is now at the point where she’s that...
Financially Savvy Local Man Decides To Fill Car Up To The Brim
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local motorist from our town's Betoota Heights district has today taken urgent action, to shore up his essential supplies.
Brayden Williams, a...
Winter Winds Leave Local Girl’s Lips Flaking Like Twice Baked Croissants
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA local girl is once again cursing her inability to hold onto her chapstick today, as she battles an onslaught of...
Reader Wife And Gamer Husband Reach Perfect Cohabitation
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactSEE YOU IN A FEW HOURS: It has now been confirmed that the perfect recipe for peaceful living together is surprisingly simple:...
Israel Begins Bombing Country It Shares No Borders With In Latest Act Of Self Defence
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The world is inhaling sharply this morning, as a geopolitical conflict threatens to grow significantly in proportion.
In some unwelcome news on a...
Childless Millennials Keep Passion Alive By Quietly Competing On Sleep Scores
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | ContactA local couple with no children and no immediate plans to change are reportedly keeping the flame of passion alive by ruthlessly monitoring...
Local Bloke Briefly Alarmed By Yellow Piss Before Remembering He Popped A Berocca This Morning
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local man has had a fleeting moment of panic today, after entering one of his work’s toilet cubicles.
Ben English, a 28-year-old finance...
Italian Government Strongly Considers Sanctioning Australia Over Domino’s Meat Pie Crust
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT
MAMA MIA! Italian parliament is currently discussing the best plan of attack in response to Australia's most recent desecration of the Pizza, the...
