Geolocation Reveals Where Girlfriend Disposed Of Boyfriend’s Air Fryer Ahead Of Dinner Party
PETE CLARK | Melbourne | CONTACT
Authorities have today confirmed a local boyfriend’s worst fears, after his precious air fryer was recovered just outside Betoota Ponds.
It had mysteriously...
Smug Man Who Doesn’t Carry A Wallet Around Anymore Apparently Not Fussed About Having 7% Battery At All Times
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local bloke has proven he really does have nerves of steel, after yet again venturing out into the wilderness with only 7%...
Dad Shocked To Receive OOO Autoreply From Wife Enjoying First Girls’ Weekend In Two Years
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local father has today confirmed he is hopeless without his wife after sending a panicked text message just...
Israeli Rugby Increasingly Concerned That Netanyahu Will Ruin Their Chances Of Ever Playing The All Blacks
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTThe Israeli rugby community have joined other left wing Israelis on the streets of Tel Aviv purely in the hope to avoid being...
Apple Maps Woman Not Ceding An Inch To Google Maps Boyfriend On First Holiday Together
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A holidaying local couple are facing their biggest relationship test yet, it can be confirmed today.
Waltzing the streets of Vienna this morning...
Report: Australia’s Housing Crisis Could Be Easily Fixed By Just Tripling The Goldie
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Finally, some action on housing!
After a decade of millennials being forced to grin and bare a manipulated property market that benefits nobody but...
Girl Gets The Ick After Watching Adult Man Tie Shoes With Bunny Ear Technique
TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact
Bella Allen (31) has found herself stifling a gag this afternoon after watching her now ex-crush tying his laces.
The ex-crush, Tim Marcs (30),...
Betoota Launches Official Bid To Host 2034 Winter Olympic Games
EDITORIAL
A Historic Moment For Betoota
The eyes of the world are on us.
Today, the proud desert township of Betoota officially launches its bold, strategic, and...
Woman Wishes Mortal Boyfriend Was More Like The Heart Throbs In Her Teen Fiction Smut
TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | ContactLaura Melphy’s disappointment is palpable this afternoon, after reluctantly accepting that her mortal boyfriend cannot, and will not, ever possess the chiselled jaw...
Modern Romance Suffering From Lack Of Songs About Situationships Calling Up High Or Drunk
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
It’s now being theorised that music may be playing a surprising role in hookup culture, as the steady decline in songs about lovers...
