Man In Finance, Who’s Working Class, 5’7, Brown Eyes, Confirms He’s Had Enough Of This Meme
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A man working in the high rise precinct of Betoota's Old City District has today confirmed that he's had enough of a popular...
“McBirths, McDeaths, McMarriages”: McDonalds Acquires Vic BDM Office
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The Victorian Government has completed the sale of the state's Office of Births, Deaths and Marriages (OBDM) to iconic...
Sydney City Unveil New Anti-Homeless Spikes That Protect Property Investments While Remaining LGBTQI-Friendly
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
As Melbourne asserts itself as the home of the F1 and fine dining, and Brisbane prepares to be crowned the sporting capital...
“Conflict In Palestine And/Or Ukraine” Says Insurance Company To Man Wondering Why His Premium Has Tripled
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local man sought answers this morning and got one he didn't expect.
Rutger Turner discovered this week that despite...
The Most Racist Politician To Lead A Major Party Since The White Australia Policy Refutes Claims Of Racism
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
A man who became a household name stoking racial divisions as both Immigration Minister and Home Affairs Minister under a string of...
Sydney Woman Time-Travels To Back To A Roaring 2013 Kings Cross After Downing A Wet Pussy Shot
STACY OAKSHEAF | City News | CONTACT
GUANZIES? Last Thursday a Sydney woman found herself seemingly transported back to the infamous 2013 heyday of Kings Cross after downing a...
Local Nutcase Has Maps App Set To Satellite Mode
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTIt has been revealed that Rick Healy (28), a known mad man in his community, has his maps app set to satellite mode.
"It's...
Tuna Cans Collecting Cobwebs In Pantry Constant Reminder Of Mans Failed Attempt At Getting Jacked
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTTyler Fernie (26) finds himself confronted with a stark reminder of his dashed dreams every time he opens his pantry door. The culprit?...
Divorced Dad’s Idea Of Dinner Indicates He’ll Be Finding The Next ‘Love Of His Life’ Very Soon
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA recently divorced bloke from Betoota Plains has been going at it quite hard with the dating apps recently, having been forced to...
Police Called To Cafe As Two People Pleasers Punch On Over Who Is Paying for Coffee This Time
STACY OAKSHEAF | City News | CONTACTIT’S MY TURN: In local news, this morning police were called to The Three Bean Cafe in Betoota’s Grove following a punch...
