Sports

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Some mouth-breathing Pom, who chose to move to Queensland because it's not a windswept, shithole island in the North Atlantic, has told punters in the front bar of the Gelded Seahorse Inn that they should be treading carefully in these next three Test matches. "You cheats better look out at Headingley!" bellowed Chris Smith, an...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The perennially underachieving state of NSW have today reminded the rest of the nation about how they simply don't understand Origin football. The wealthiest and most populous state did so by naming their team for the 3rd State of Origin match. Taking place next Wednesday in the soulless sprawl that is the Olympic Village out in Homebush, NSW...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some breaking news from the 'home of cricket' this morning, it can be confirmed that English fast bowler Stuart Broad is now the moral arbiter on what is and isn't within the 'spirit of cricket.' The man known for being a cheat, and bragging about being a cheat, and laughing about being a cheat has come out...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT After one of their best starts to a season in recent memory, the St Kilda football club are taking the opportunity to relax and re-charge off the back of a well earned bye. Sitting a comfortable 5th position on the ladder after shooting out to an early lead in the first few rounds of the season, the Saints...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Australian batsman David Warner has provided cricket fans with a lovely moment overnight, after being spotted indulging in an interesting part time. The fiery opener was pictured enjoying some crosswords during the tail of Australia's first innings, something not expected of professional cricketers. Warner's quick literacy tests came as the veteran took a break from watching cardoons on...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Brisbane Broncos fullback Reece Walsh has entered a not guilty plea ahead of facing the Judiciary on Tuesday night, following an expletive-riddled on-field spray during his team's loss to the Titans on Sunday. Walsh was charged with Contrary Conduct towards a match official, and referred straight to Judiciary for the charge of swearing at a referee in the 74th...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some breaking news from the supposed 'home of cricket,' a major question about the future of the game has been posed. With chat swirling around about the long term viability of the five day Test Cricket format, the issue of England's place in the game has been raised. Following a stunning 89 run victory for the Australian...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The 2nd men's Ashes Test looks set for a significant shake up this week, after some huge changes to playing conditions. With Australia 1-0 up after a historic win in Birmingham thanks to 2 of their 3 number 11's firing at the back end of the innings, ground staff at the second venue have served up a rude...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The parent company of the UFC Gym Australian franchisees has collapsed into administration this week amid legal battles with the gym owners. The company behind UFC Gym Australia were ordered to pay millions to three franchise owners after a court found them and its directors had 'engaged in misleading and deceptive conduct' when the franchises...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The St George Illawarra Dragons have denied Ben Hunt's request to break his playing contract at a meeting this morning, telling him that fans will expect to find a body in the wreckage once the season is over. The meeting took place in a Beechcraft King Air over Botany Bay this morning, with Saints chairman...