“So, The LNP Is Just Labor But Pro-Abortion And Entirely Beholden To A Faction Of Bible-Thumping Maniacs?” Asks Confused Older Voter
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
As Queensland heads to the polls today, a debate rages on in the carpark of the Green Street State...
Ragdoll Just The Cat Version Of Buying An Expensive Poodle Hybrid
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn the latest trend to sweep through the world of luxury pet ownership, cat lovers are found to be embracing Ragdolls like dog...
Bloke On First Date Out For A Golden Duck After Not Confirming Order On The QR Menu For 18 Minutes
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact
A local bloke has been marched early this evening after totally fumbling through the first round of drinks on a date.
The...
Report: Bunnings Last Place In The Country Where You Can Buy Lunch Under $10
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | ContactIn dire cost of living news, the nation’s largest chain of hardware stores has become the cheapest place to buy lunch.
In...
Bloke Buying Last Minute Groceries For Homemade Tzatziki Aware He Looks Like A Massive Freak
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA bloke purchasing a single cucumber and bottle of olive oil at a Woolies checkout has unfortunately realised too late that it looks...
Local Girl At Westfields Given Option Of Single Use Landfill Or $100 On A Tank Top
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local woman attempting to demolish some of her tax return at Westfields has yet again returned home empty handed, having been faced...
35 Year Old Sadly At The Age Where He Has To Rule Out ‘Stair Countries’ When Planning Holidays
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT
Betoota local Brendan Kaur (35) has hit a sobering milestone—he now has to consider “how many stairs there are” when planning a...
Local Freak’s Dreams Come True As Duolingo Release Simlish Course
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Betoota Heights freak Jenny Malone is celebrating the news that language app Duolingo has officially released a course in...
Local Woman Realises It Is Impossible To Cook A Pad Thai That Costs Less Than Takeaway
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT
After carefully budgeting and promising herself she’d “eat out less,” local woman Sophie Brooks (29) has arrived at a grim truth: making...
Local Man Now Rich And Single Enough To ‘Get Into Watches’
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACTBetoota Hills local Tim Davids (29) has unlocked a new tier of adulthood, achieving the perfect mix of disposable income, existential boredom,...
