Power-Tripping Coworker Chooses Shitty Xmas Party Venue That Caters To Her Cigarette Habit
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The entire workplace of Lorigan And Co Accountants in Betoota Heights have today been treated to the news that next week's staff...
“Coal Is Technically Vegan And Organic” Says Inner-City Leftie Justifying Purchase Of Tesla
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A semi-retired geologist is at the centre of a localised firestorm this today after he attempted to justify the purchase of a used...
Pub Raconteur’s Story Ruined By Mate’s Mate Googling Everything
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
"Who was that cunt and why did you bring him to the pub last night?"
At 6:04 am this morning, the first message buzzed...
Parents Complain About The Decreasing Value Of Their Property Like Their Kid Is Supposed To Care
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
After flagellating herself all morning for being born middle-class to two polite and stable property owners, a happy-go-lucky city worker has had to endure...
Man Shamefully Walks To Bin To Pick Up Paper Ball He Didn’t Get In
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
The 2-metre gap between Carl Mackinnon and the office recycling bin is feeling more like 200 metres today after he attempted to throw...
Kidnapper’s Girlfriend Tired Of Having Her Magazines Cut Up For Ransom Letters
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
After years of silent compliance Susanne,* girlfriend of career kidnapper Brody,* has stated she is tired of having her magazines cut up and...
Curious Man Wonders How Perennially-Empty Travel Agency In Local Strip Mall Stays Afloat
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A popular local thinking man has been bamboozled by a Betoota Heights travel agency this afternoon because despite never...
Unsupervised Boomer Finds Himself Watching SBS Food Again
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A Betoota Grove father-of-four has been left to his own devices this morning, something that the sexagenarian relishes and...
Phone Addiction Realised After Attempt To Set Alarm Results In 30 Minute Social Media Scroll
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
Local woman Alyshia Stephenson has just come to after losing 30 minutes of her life down a social media black hole.
Dazed and confused,...
Woman Deletes Message From Stranger In Hopes Of Removing Drunken Friendship From Memory
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
Ellen Sobrata has woken this morning with more than just an alcoholic hangover.
She’s also experiencing sharp pangs of anxiety brought on by the...
