Local Serial Killer Certain He’s Handsome Enough To Be Worthy Of A Podcast
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact
Known for terrorising a suburban neighbourhood over a six-year period and looking dapper while doing it, local serial killer Norman Tyler (35) is...
Ageing Rock God Impressed By Crowd’s Harmonised Groan After He Starts Playing Some New Stuff
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
An iconic rock god from the late 80s has tonight found himself admiring his thousand-strong crowd after they were able to hit a...
Man With Dinner Plans Responsibly Moves From Pints To Schooeys After 6th Beer In 2-Hour Window
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
Local man, Jim Sampson, has impressed his friends this evening after publicly declaring that he has dinner and isn’t going to drink any...
Junior Stockbroker Enters Next Phase Of Career After Being Invited To Long Lunch By Boss
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
Junior stockbroker, Nathan Abbott-Smith’s pig-like behaviour has paid off today after his boss extended him an invitation to a partner-only long lunch.
The...
Charity Auctioneer Patiently Waits Until Crowd’s A Couple Deep Before Kicking Things Off
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
The Betoota Bulls Charity Ball has been a landmark on the town’s social calendar for quite some time.
Reports from the scene say...
Inner-City Leftie Hopes Tragic Redevelopment Of Nearby Public Housing Has A Good Cafe At Least
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Local inner-city leftie Gen Eckse (49) says the dispossession and forced removal of generations of low-income and vulnerable inner-city residents is such...
Lebanese Barber Swears To God Mate You Shoulda Seen The Tatts On The Bloke We Just Had In Here
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Prominent Betoota hairdresser and male grooming expert, Elie Corrie (57) says you wouldn't believe the rare unit they had in the shop this...
Apprentice Whose Phone Has Been Cut-Off For Unpaid Bills Puts 20 Inch Rims On His Work Van
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Apprentice chippy Luke Swainy (19) has today provided the older blokes on site with a rare glimpse into how his cannabis-hazed brain works.
Swanny,...
Piss-Cutting Legend Taps Phone Camera With Cold Beer In Heartbreakingly Lonely Instagram Story
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Betoota Heights fridgie Sammo Black (25) has today shown all of his Instagram followers just how seriously he takes knock off.
After a big...
‘Where Did The Weekend Go’ Asks Woman Who Was Cooking Pasta At 3 AM On Saturday Night
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
A young local woman from Betoota's French Quarter is doing a bit of soul searching at her desk this morning.
The woman named...
