Local Bloke Escapes Clutches of Boring Colleague By Announcing “Mate, I’m Dying for a Piss”
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTAs a professional with 10+ years experience in corporate life, local accountant Adam Edwards knows how to navigate an office Christmas...
Menthol Cigarettes To Be Banned In Horrible Attack On Divorcees
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTWith another attack on e-cigarettes and other tobacco products on the horizon, menthol cigarettes could be banned in what is being described as...
Local Dad Gives Lesbian Couple ‘The Nod’ For Some Reason
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A silent kinship has been sort of shared in Betoota Heights today as a local dad gave a lesbian couple ‘the nod’ for...
Woman On Date With A Bloke Named Todd Just Can’t Imagine Shouting His Name In The Throes Of Passion
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT“I know I’m being a little bit unreasonable”, says a distraught Becca Bianchi, “but fuck Hannah.”
“I just can’t do it.”
“I can’t…."
"I can’t date...
Local Woman Uses Her Boyfriend Privilege By Getting Absolutely Shitfaced At Girls Bottomless Brunch
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACTSlumped over a table at exactly 2:56pm, French Quarter local Kaylee Wattle has officially tapped out of bottomless brunch.
Having both the appetite...
Australian Cricket Team Urged To Consider Backyard Rule Requiring Batsmen To Retire At 50
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
Cricket Australia has today been hit with a radical new proposal, just an hour into the Test summer.
With the Australian Cricket team...
Nobody Surprised As Carindale Fernwood Gym Named As Top 1% Of P!nk Listeners
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactAs everyone rushes to Instagram to post their results and secretly judge each other on their music tastes and dissect listening personality types...
South American Minnow Nation Argentina Scrape Through To Face Football Powerhouses Australia
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
In an underdog story that everyone except the Americans and the English can get around, the tiny footballing nation of Argentina lives to...
Armchair Expert To Dip Into His U/10s Soccer Career To Scream Strategic Advice At Socceroos
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
Like many Aussie blokes whose belt size sits in the 40s, Harry “Hogga” Armstrong has never had an athletic build suited...
Co-Worker Asks If You Heard Their Repulsive Neck Crack
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTOffice worker Beatrice Bremmer (35) is considering going to HR and The Hague today after her co-worker Cindy Clunk (30) audibly cracked her...
