Office Extrovert Can’t Grab A Biscuit At Morning Tea Without Announcing She’s ‘Being Naughty’
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACTAn office extrovert has once again reminded her colleagues that she is, in fact, "being naughty", simply by eating a biscuit.
Sue Walters...
“Forgive Me, Father, For I Have Sinned” Says Dad Dosing Toddler With Panadol Before Daycare
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local father sought absolution yesterday morning after committing what he describes as a necessary evil, administering 5mL of...
Property Investors Prepare Their Snouts For Impending Interest Rate Cut
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The nation's aspirational class have been four years in the financial doldrums as interest rates shot up and cut...
Kid Named Thor Unfortunately Grows Up To Be A Massive Dweeb
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Betoota Heights bloke has this week urged people to please reconsider naming their children after fictional characters, having never been able...
Local Bloke Tells Girlfriend That She Really Should Have Clarified What She Meant By Roleplaying
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
A Betoota Heights couple have this week discovered that they both have a very different definition of what ‘roleplaying’ is, which has...
“It’s Jam-Bon, With a Hard J,” Insists Queenslander Recently Returned from Spain
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local man has returned from a taxpayer-funded shipbuilding junket to Spain with a new interest. Spanish things. Which...
AusPost Announces Last Outstanding Christmas Parcel Has Finally Been Delivered
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTIn national logistics news, AusPost have confirmed that every Christmas package and letter to Santa has finally been delivered.
In a press...
“I Don’t Give A Shit About The Trains, I Need You In The Office Today” Says Boss Who Drove His New BMW In
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A city worker has this morning received a firm directive from his boss, who has demanded that he make...
Valentine’s Day Falling On Friday Guarantees The Single Girlies Are Getting Fucken Pixelated Tonight
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn an occurrence as rare as Halley’s Comet, a female friendship group have all found themselves single on Valentine’s Day on a...
Local P-Plater Instinctively Revs Engine Near Group of Babes, Forgets He’s Driving Mum’s Corolla
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT
In an embarrassing display of primal male instinct, Betoota Heights teen Kyle Sharp (17) set out to enjoy the newfound freedom of...
