Woman Who Has A Great Relationship With Boyfriend Fully Prepared To Belt ‘Someone You Loved’ At Splendour
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactBetoota Heights woman Renee Hawthorn has today announced she plans on passionately belting out multiple Lewis Capaldi songs at Splendour in the...
“Why Should Indigenous People Get Special Treatment” Asks Man Who Makes Bank Off Franking Credits And Negatively Gears 4 Investment Properties
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A man who describes himself as having an 'engrained sense of fairness' has today explained to The Advocate an issue that has been...
Sweet Potato Called In Like Theatre Understudy Waiting For Big Break
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
With a potato shortage rocking the world, sweet potato has been called in to officially bask in the starchy spotlight.
Due to unprecedented frost...
Drunken Teenager Personally Testing The Strength Of Every Single Sign On Street
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Inebriated youth Lewis Lumpley (16) is doing his bit for his community tonight by personally testing the strength of every single sign on...
Streaming Service Now Recommending Easter Classics Whatever The Fuck They Are
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Streaming services are getting right into something allegedly called ‘the Easter Spirit’ by recommending some Easter classics, whatever the fuck they are.
These...
Mate With Quiet Love Life Fires Up Group Chat To Gauge Early Interest In Attending Magic Round
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
A helpless Bachelor is attempting to fill his calendar tonight as he looks for a way to spice up his year....
VX Celebrates First Successful Month Of Ruining High School Parties
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Due to current times being tough, VB went ahead and released a new beer because we all deserve a little treat.
Named Xtra Victoria...
Bloke Who’s Been Burnt By Good Friday’s No Alcohol Rule Buys Enough To Last Through Apocalypse
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Betoota Ponds bloke has today shown some rare initiative, proving that he is actually capable of being prepared…should he have the right...
Young Liberal Forced To Cancel Niseko Ski Trip Because Dad Wants Him In London For Coronation
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A young Liberal hoping to get in some late season shred will have to forget about it for now as his father has...
Local Cafe Loses Trading Licence After Turning $12 Ham and Cheese Croissant Into French Quesadilla
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA cafe in Betoota’s central business district has been reported to authorities today for an atrocious crime against food standards.
The Advocate...
