Local Millennial Has An Existential Crisis After Radio Host Refers To Linkin Park As ‘Classic Rock’
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local bloke has found himself having a mini meltdown in his car this morning, after a chirpy radio host had the audacity...
World Shocked To Learn The English Like To Whinge
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTIn a cricketing event that has managed to capture the attention of even people too cool to usually enjoy cricket, the English lost...
Report Calls For Architects Of Robodebt To Be Treated As Guilty Until They Prove Innocence
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT
A damning report into the awful and illegal government scheme that was Robodebt has been handed down today.
Along with 57 recommendations, the...
Cost Of Living Crisis Means Macarons Are Out Of The Question For Whoever The Fuck Buys Them
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTWith essentials like GP visits, groceries, petrol and a bag of chips for Friday night footy all increasing in price, Australians are cutting...
“Wow It Tastes Like Hubba Bubba” Says Local Bloke Yet To Experience The True Reckoning Of A Night On Soju
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
A local uni student is about to experience the destructive force of Korean rocket fuel this evening as he attempts to...
Entrepreneur Who Stockpiled TP in Lockdown Now Buying Up Glittery Cowboy Hats Before Taylor Swift
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTAustralia’s next Mike Cannon-Brooks has jumped at a lucrative business opportunity this week as he looks to cash in on the...
Woman Who Brushed Teeth To Stop Late Night Snacking Finds Herself Rummaging In Cupboard Again At 11pm
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local woman has this week been thwarted by her feeble attempt to stop snacking, as even freshly brushed teeth could not resist...
Melbourne Boys Congregating On Phillip Island Beach Mistaken As Part Of Penguin Parade
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactTourists eager to see penguins on Phillip Island beach have gotten more than they bargained for this late afternoon, after spotting what looked...
Sulking Local English Man Told To Stop Trying To ‘Bazlight’ His Aussie Mates
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT
A local Englishman has today been informed that enough is enough.
The yellow toothed stinky unwashed ex pat from the the United Sookdom...
Frosty Winter Mornings Doing Absolute Wonders For Pre-Work Gym Routine
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT
A local man has confirmed to The Advocate today that he's already had enough of this winter.
Speaking to our humble regional newspaper...
