Scientists Release First Ever Image Of Federal Government’s Balance Sheet For NBN Roll-Out
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
In some exciting news for the science world, the first ever image of a black hole has been captured today.
The incredible scientific...
QUIZ: On A Scale Of 1 To Peter Dutton – How Much Of A Dumb Cunt Are You?
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
With last night's Four Corners exposè providing even greater insight into the limited brain function of Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton, the Member...
Aliens Bypass Earth After Learning About CrossFit
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
Extra-terrestrial researchers had their life’s ambition ripped away from them at the last minute today after an unidentified flying object heading for Earth...
Absolute Fucking Wanker Does That Beer Thing
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
A local man has today demonstrated to all of his colleagues why he is the office funny guy.
Bradley Thomas did so a...
Nightwatchman Refuses To Grant Assange Refuge After WikiLeaks Blows Whistle On Engadine Maccas
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
The nation's Nightwatchman has today officially ruled out taking Julian Assange in from the London cold.
While commentators expected this would be the...
Inner City Leftie To Vote Liberal After Shorten Vows To Make Electric Cars Less Exclusive
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
One of Betoota's French Quarter residents has confirmed to The Advocate this afternoon that he will, 'unfortunately,' have to vote Liberal at the up...
Telecommunication Customer Service Rep Pretends To Care About Local Woman’s Threats To Leave
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
An irate local woman has completely misjudged her audience this morning by assuming a part-time telecommunications employee actually cares about her threats to...
Success: Teen’s Crush Throws Self At Her After Forwarded Email To 15 Friends Within 30 Secs
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact
Teenager Belinda Monk (15) has trouble believing her luck as the year 9 student has finally won the heart of her long time...
Nightwatchman Admits He Was On The Sauce For The 6 Months He Spent Plotting Turnbull’s Demise
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
"This is my leader and I'm ambitious for him " declared a seemingly sincere Scott Morrison, with his hand wrapped around Malcolm Turnbull,...
Gladys’s Team Reveal Justin Bieber’s ‘Sorry’ Is Her Campaign Song
TRACEY BENDINGER | Social Nuances | Contact
The significance of today’s election is not lost on the current Premier of New South Wales, Gladys Berejiklian, with her campaign team...
