Collingwood Football Club Beg Eddie McGuire To Lace Up The Boots For One Last Cover Up
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
After a quiet few months, the AFL's most famous club is in the headlines again.
The Collingwood Football Club has been forced to...
“Haha That New Streaming Service Looks So Good” Hints Housemate With No Accounts In His Name
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
A savvy local student has today begun a covert campaign to get his housemate to do him a solid.
Eyeing...
Mate Who Hit It A Little Too Hard At Pre-Drinks Lovingly Tucked Into Bean Bag
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT
A local bloke has hit it a little too hard on the pre-drinks tonight, taking himself out before it even hit 8 pm.
As...
“I Came As Myself” Says World’s Most Boring Man Dressed Normally At Halloween Party
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Guests at a Betoota Ponds Halloween party were astutely underwhelmed today as the town’s most boring man came dressed as himself.
At 35 years...
Regional Bachelor Takes It To The Next Level By Airfrying His Chips
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local fitter and turner has levelled up this week, by splashing out on a shiny new gadget.
Brandon Williams has finally caved and...
South Coast Gift Shop Triples Candle Production As Sydney Prepares To Be Let Off The Leash
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
Wax is pouring and wicks are in high demand, as a South Coast gift shop begins working overtime in preparation for...
PM Stopped By Customs At Glasgow For Attempting To Smuggle A Lump Of Coal To Climate Summit
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The Prime Minister has been caught up in a sticky situation today, being stopped by customs officers at the airport in Glasgow.
The...
High School Teacher Frustrated By No Longer Having The Ability To Mute Class Clown
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
It's been a tough year for Sydney teacher Georgia Simpson, something she'll always happily tell anyone about at length.
While the logistical nightmare...
Corporate Warrior Posts Indulgent LinkedIn Essay After Receiving First Aid Certificate
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
A professional showboat has enjoyed publicly pleasuring himself this afternoon, after posting a 400-word essay on LinkedIn to announce he’d received...
Coked Up FIFO Who Lives In A Gold Coast Canal 6 Bedder Says PM Has Betrayed Rural Australia
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
An entire workforce of carbon-exposed tradesmen have today declared their disgust with the man they voted for in 2019.
This comes as Scotty From...
