“Surely They Don’t Mean Us,” Say Holidaying Inner-City Lefties Staying In Some French Prick’s Flat
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A pair of teal-voting lunatics from the French Quarter, our town's vibrant yet hellish bohemian distrcit, have been mugged...
Dog That Sounds Like A Goose Choking On A Straw Actually ‘Perfectly Healthy’ According To Owner
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact
An owner of a pug has found yet again themselves swatting away the concern of kind hearted strangers, who incorrectly assumed a dog...
Mate Who’s The Embodiment Of Murphy’s Law Informs Group Chat She’s Fucked Up Her Phone Again
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactTracey Alcott is what you call a bit of a ‘hot mess.’
A little scatterbrained and quick to react, Tracey has a tendency...
Fraud With Motorcycle Helmet Has Been Riding A Vespa The Whole Time
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTEarlier today, a local fraud has been outed as the shifty dishonest phoney he really is.During an afternoon at Station Bar in Betoota’s...
Correlation Found Between Placing Vibrating Xbox Controller On Your Nuts And Driving A Modified Car
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn some random news in market research, it's been discovered that a correlation has been found between blokes who deliberately placed their Xbox...
Coincidence? Australia’s Highest Income Postcode Also Happens To Have Highest Dickhead Ratio
RORY SALAZAR | Finance | CONTACTAustralia’s highest income postcode has finally been revealed in new data released by the ATO.However, that is not the whole story. Further analysis...
LinkedIn Confirms That All The Girls Who Started People’s Scoobies Are In Managerial Positions Now
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA rather niche LinkedIn study has found a surprising indication of success amongst millennials, stemming all the way back from Primary school.
For those...
Idiot Mate’s Childish Hatred Of Coriander Automatically Rules Out 4 Different Cuisines For Dinner
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA bloke with a childish palate has made dinner plans unnecessarily difficult this evening, after piping up that his delicate taste buds couldn’t...
Couple Who’d Happily Elope Guilted Into Spending House Deposit To Appease Both Sides Of The Family
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA couple that understands that money doesn’t grow on trees has this week been guilt tripped into spending $45K on what essentially is...
Side Hustle Scotty Confirms He’s Taking Oscar Piastri’s Contract With Alpine For Next F1 Season
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn some very unwelcome news for Formula 1 fans, it can be revealed that the Alpine contract disaster has now been sorted out...
