“Pffft Big Woop NASA” Says Man Who Put His Celica Into The Only Pole In The ALDI Carpark Doing Dougheys
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A Betoota Heights man is unimpressed with NASA's recent effort to crash a satellite into an asteroid.
Damien Clark says...
Katter Says He Supports Federal ICAC Legislation Despite Lack Of A Guillotine Or Even A Pool Of Hungry Crocodiles To Throw Corrupt Politicians Into
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The Member For Kennedy has welcomed the introduction of federal corruption watchdog legislation to the House of Representatives today,...
Optus Hacker Apologises For Everything And Says He’s Been Grounded For Entire School Holidays
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A 9-year-old boy from our nation's self-serving, sanctimonious "first state" of New South Wales has apologised for hacking into...
“That Should Make Me Feel Better” Says Man Who Just Pumped Two Kilos Of Cheesey Bowties
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A French Quarter has made himself some comfort food this afternoon because he went quite hard on the weekend...
Halal Certification No Longer A Concern For Rednecks After A Few Years Of Genuine Drama
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTIn things you may not have thought about in absolute yonks, it has been confirmed that Halal Certification is no longer the number...
Police Determine Optus Hacker Probably Isn’t In Sydney After Asking For Modest $1m Ransom
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Investigators have been able to narrow down the Optus hacker's whereabouts today after they asked for a pathetic $1m...
Optus Apologise To Customers For Extreme Privacy Breach The Only Way They Know How By Offering Free Talk And Text After 8
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The capital city shitebags caught up in the Optus data hack have been offered free talk and text after...
Perrottet: “We Will Fix Poor Student Behaviour By Employing One Boomer Advisor On A Salary Higher Than My Own”
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
In light of very poor behaviour from a number of students in New South Wales, the state's government is...
Likelihood Of Millennial Entering A Toxic Relationship Directly Correlated To Which Jackass Guy They Were Into
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIn some truly groundbreaking psychology findings, researchers specialising in millennial relationship trends have found a startling correlation between having a crush on the...
Report: Imagine The Fucking Carry-On If This Bloke Got Flown To London
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTAfter enjoying an official public holiday and a cheeky non-official one to make it a four day weekend, Australians now feel somewhat vindicated...
