WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A groundbreaking new study has been released this week, which is set to shake the beverage industry to its core.
A landmark report from Betoota’s major drinking body Licensing Inquiries and Testing For Australian Management (LITFAM), has confirmed that Coopers are essentially the Favourites of the beer world.
The lead researcher on the study spoke to The Advocate about the major local findings.
“After nearly a decade of intense research, our 13 person strong team is incredibly proud to be able to release this body of work,” said Corey Smith.
“We encourage your readers to sit down and sift through the 157 page report themselves, but the three main findings are as follows.”
“Firstly, Favourites have a long reputation of being the thing you bring to a BBQ when you are told not to bring a thing. A case of Coopers, preferably Green, are the perfect beer equivalent of that. You will not hear any complaints from anyone if you arrive with a case of South Australia’s biggest export.”
“Secondly, the mixed box of confectionery are widely loved in a large part because there is something for everyone. Coopers are the malt and hops equivalent of that. While there are a number of different coloured drops, even the staple Green cans will satisfy most. From your father in law who hates all the crazy choice, to your brother’s new girlfriend who doesn’t normally drink beer, a cold tin of Coopers will generally be a winner.”
“Thirdly, Coopers and Favourites translate. They are the local product for local people all around the country. Sure, it’s the beer from Adelaide, but you can find it at home, at any BBQ, or in bottle shops and pubs right around Australia. And it’s this familiarity that makes it the box of beer favourites that you can rely on as a safe pair of hands.”
58 year old bloke named Darryl who was a part of the study spoke to The Advocate about the findings.
When asked about them, he responded saying “Yeah, I guess so.”