ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Our nation’s prosperous West has been cut off again and the hermit kingdom’s defacto leader, Mark McMaoan, has ordered his land militia once again to shoot down all unauthorised air traffic.

In addition to those orders, Mr McMaoan’s private army has also been given the green light to engage vehicles and people attempting to cross the land and sea borders.

“This afternoon, in consolation with our nation’s major airlines, I have given them 6 hours notice to terminate all flights to and from Western Australia!” he told the West’s Politburo today.

A deafening roar blasted from the room.

“At 11:59pm tonight, all unauthorised air traffic over Western Australia will be destroyed. Praise be to our governor, Kim Beazley. May he live for a thousand years,”

“I have also asked my forces to the East to engage traffic trying to cross the border on the Nullabor and the Kimberly. We also have ringers and chopper pilots from the Kimberly who will be flying the border. Should they find someone trying to sneak over, they will learn what a level-action .30-30 is and know that it’s actually surprisingly easy to both fly an R22 and shoot something,”

“With Kim as my witness, we will be safe. I will protect you all.”

Another roar.

“God save the Kim!”

More to come.


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