ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

As per company protocol, the head of Cricket Australia has sworn a blood oath to chairman and company figurehead Rupert Murdoch this afternoon during an induction ceremony in Sydney.

James Sutherland told the media this morning that upon signing the landmark broadcast deal with the Seven Network and Foxtel, he was immediately ushered into a small room off the main meeting room at Sydney’s News Limited offices and forced into drawing blood from his hand.

“They handed me a knife and told me to drag it across my palm, which I thought was a bit full on. They didn’t even tell me if the knife was clean or not,” he said.

“When I tried to pump the brakes a bit, one of Rupert’s cronies pulled his Tarocash jacket open and showed me that he had a rather large handgun in a shoulder holster. Needless to say, I quickly cut my hand open,”

“They pulled a small black and white picture of Rupert out of an envelope and made me read out this oath while my blood trickled off my palm and down onto his face. It was pretty weird but money’s money. I’m looking forward the future.”

The Advocate reached out to Mr Murdoch and News Limited for comment but only received a signed black cheque in response.

More to come.


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