ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A 28-year-old Betoota Heights man explained to The Advocate today that he’s unsure of what he’ll get first – the PlayStation 5 that he pre-ordered last October or the Michelle Pfeiffer jab that some public servant promised him in March.

Sam Overell, nephew to The Advocate’s reporter Clancy, said he’s been waiting for things to become clearer but given the past 18 months of perpetual ineptitude from state and federal governments, he still has no idea when either of them will arrive.

“It’s disappointing to say the least,” Sam explained.

The former Whooton School student then said a few other things but our reporter got distracted staring into the boy’s massive forehead.

“I know it’s big,” he said as our reporter snapped back to consciousness.

“Anyway, the government has said I can get the Boomer Remover Astro whatever it is but I don’t want that. I want the good one that Scott Morrison had. I don’t want the one that almost killed Greg Hunt,”

“Please stop looking at my forehead, my eyes are down here. It’s not my fault I was born like this. My parents both have massive foreheads and I got the super forehead. It’s a genetic throwback. My great grandpa was banned from looking over the top of trenches at the Somme because they’d shoot the top off his head before he even got look in. The troops used to put shit on him, my grandpa said. He said it was a classic case of workplace bullying,”

“Back to what I was saying. I ordered by PS5 but all the stock, both times, went to metropolitan areas. You don’t see David Littleproud going into bat for EB Games, JB Hifi and others here in Betoota. He’s been to he Harvey Norman in Windorah heaps of times and my mates in Winny got their PS5s like 6 months ago,”

“I just feel helpless.”

More to come.


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