ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Australian ski resorts are feeling the heat now that customers can go to New Zealand, forcing one popular location to slash their prices.

Thredbo, which this masthead understands is in the foothills of Mount Kosciusko, is now trying to lure customers lost to New Zealand back by offering up a bed in a mixed dorm for the bargain-basement sum of $4950 a night.

The resort’s accommodation executive president spoke candidly to The Advocate this afternoon about why the nation’s middle class shouldn’t write them off just yet.

“If you do the maths, it much cheaper to take your family to Thredbo,” they said.

“A week, in July during school holidays, a family could get away for as little as $70000. Which when you think about it, is just a brand new Subaru Outback, a new set of Pings and some veneers for your mouth after you get booted in the gob for cutting in line down at Friday Flat,”

“Thredbo is just a few hours away, no borders to ruin the fun. Sure, at times it might be like skiing on black ice. But at least you’re at the snow. That’s what we say here at Thredbo. At least you’re not at work,”

“Even if you don’t ski, you can get the chairlift up to Eagle’s Lair or whatever the fuck it’s called and get on the piss up there. The lift pass up only costs $900. You can get pretty fucked up there, too. No security. You can get so drunk up in that bar, getting on the chairlift to go back down might as well be brain surgery,”

“That’s what Queenslanders want when they come to the snow, isn’t it? Cheap alcohol and somewhere to sleep?”

Our reporter put the phone down.

More to come.


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