EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT
Local bloke Adam Thompson should have known better than to take his date to a ritzy Italian restaurant, if not for the overpriced arancini balls but because he can’t pronounce anything on the menu.
But considering he’d nabbed a chick his mates had lovingly suggested was ‘punching above his weight’ Adam has felt the need to lay it on pretty thick by taking her to the finest restaurant Betoota Heights has to offer, ‘Bella Noce.’
Though he would have simply opted for the one item on the menu he was familiar with (a $35 Parmigiana), Adam has a feeling his date will judge him for choosing what is essentially one of the most quintessential pub food items in Australia. And as an IT consultant or ‘person integral to ensuring the database integrity of important government systems’ (as he’d told his date), Adam has to keep the masquerade going anyway we can. Though he doesn’t even know how to pronounce that word either.
“Um, I’ll have the…arancini balls to start off with and the wag-yu bres….the meat one.”
“And for main I think I’ll go with the argh….cap?”
Looking at the waiter with silent desperation, Adam attempts to slowly draw out the word in the hopes the waiter will take pity on him and take over.
“Capre….uh.”
“Capricciosa pizza?”
“Nope, not that one.”
“Capriolo?”
“No -.”
“Ah si, the Caprese Insalata?”
Shaking his head and pointing a fat finger at one of the menu items, Adam tries one last attempt to win this futile game of charade.
“Capra e Fagioli!”
“…”
“You know what, I’ll just get the parmi, thanks.”
