Local woman, Jescinta Thompson is just dying to talk smack about a mutual acquaintance.

So much so, she’s been trying to find an appropriate break in the conversation to segue for approximately fifteen minutes now.

However, considering the chat amongst her mates has been quite lighthearted, Jescinta doesn’t want to be the one responsible for dampening the mood.

So hopefully someone will say something slightly bitchy or the aforementioned ‘Chloe Sims’ is brought up in the conversation.

Hankering any keyword to jump in, Jescinta finally has her chance when her friend Trish says work has been a bit shitty lately.

“Omg speaking of something shitty”, says Jescinta in a conspiring tone, “you won’t believe what Chloe did the other day.”

As all heads swivelled in interest to the juicy goss, Jescinta waited for a chorus of ‘omg whats’ before continuing her train of thought.

“We were going out and she said she wanted to go to The Cashew & Pogostick Hotel but I was like, there are no cute guys there?”

“And she’s like ‘you don’t get a say, Jescinta, you have a boyfriend.”

“Which is obviously a huge fucking swipe at me. Like what is she saying? That I’m bad for wanting to be around cute guys and not somewhere where the average age demographic is 50? Like sorry for not wanting to sit in the durry section and talk to men with handlebar moustaches.”

“I honestly think she’s just projecting because she hasn’t had a date in years, which isn’t my fault you know? Like maybe if she wasn’t so picky she’d have a boyfriend by now.”

Sensing that she may have crossed the line with her hate-filled rant, Jescinta tries to backtrack whilst also seeking validation.

“I don’t know, maybe it’s just me though?”

“She was probably just having a bad day.”

More to come.


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