As far as Andre Colby is concerned, there is actually no point to half the shit people call art nowadays.

The Betoota Heights-based pokie rep says he was less than impressed by a recent visit to Brisbane’s Gallery Of Modern Art.

“Whatever happened to just painting a picture of a person?” he says.

“Or a boat… None of that shit made any sense. I couldn’t actually make out any of it”

Andre, who sports a 20-inch-long jet black Polynesian-themed, but ultimately meaningless, tribal tattoo – says that his 4-year-old kid could paint half the shit his wife makes him look at when they visit any form of metropolitan centre.

When quizzed by reporters as the type of art he prefers, Andre says something that at least looks real.

“Have you ever seen Banksy or like Sofles?” he says, referencing the prominent guerilla artists he follows on Instagram, and also hinting to brief delinquent phase in high school.

“At least their stuff makes sense”

Our Brisbane field reporters continue to quiz Andre about his preferred aesthetic when it comes to the visual arts, eventually drawing attention to his tattoo.

However, Andre’s tattoo – which is according to the Betoota West tattoo parlour was created by an online tribal design generator and titled ‘Idea flame arm fantasy pattern, sleeve single’ – appears to be an exception to his rule that art needs to make sense.

“I got this because it looks mad and the cunts in Queenstown wouldn’t give me one of the proper ones”


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