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Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today backed the Queensland State Government’s plans to allow the powerful stain removal multinational Napisan Vanish to use the sickly acres of the Great Barrier Reef’s bleached white coral as a billboard.

Mr Morrison defended Queensland Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk’s acceptance of the soap empire’s submission, calling it a “no-brainer”.

“This is one of the biggest laundry products in the country. And Queensland are some of the dirtiest people” he said, speaking at a press conference in some other town with no interest in the reef.

“Why not put it on the biggest billboard Queensland has?

“These ads generate massive economic opportunities for the state.

This follows Federal Environment Minister Melissa Price has put some of her extensive scientific knowledge to good use today by calling bullshit on the recent report released by the United Nations’ Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) – a study that was put together by 91 of the brightest minds in the world, but inconveniently opposed to the views of the mining lobbies.

The report claims that world greenhouse gas emissions must reach zero by 2050 if we are to ensure that Global Warming is halted at 1.5 degrees. If this wasn’t to happen the planet could warm by 2 degrees which would be a “tipping point.”

The forming mining sector employee argued this morning that some of the world’s leading climate scientists are “drawing a long bow” in calling for an end to coal power to limit global warming.

However, Scott Morrison says that while he refuses to believe in the idea that the earth is getting hotter because of reckless big business decadence, if the reef wants to continue bleaching itself for no reason then it may as well be used as some sort of a billboard.

“Initially Adani wanted to jump on board and advertise on the beautiful plains of rotting coral” he said.

“But Palaszczuk let that one go through to the keeper, because she reckons Adani has nothing to do with the reef at all and putting advertising on it wouldn’t make sense because the two aren’t linked in anyway”

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