CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The tide is turning against one of Australia’s most protected rackets, as more and more hospitality venues decide to transition away from the scourge of pokies.
Historically, it has only been Western Australia and the more conservative regions of Queensland that held strong against the extremely high margins that come with polluting pubs and clubs with gaming machines that are rigged heavily against the poor suckers who play them out of desperation, boredom and loneliness.
The organised-crime hive of NSW were the first to pretend these machines were just a bit of fun, and not a cancer on society that uses algorithmic endorphin hits to bleed the working class of their household incomes.
Gradually, certain operators in Victoria, NT, Brisbane and Adelaide followed suit.
In recent decades, this eccentric little past-time of bright lights and exciting bells has transformed into a well-oiled political lobby machine.
Any politician that even thinks of regulating these machines suddenly has to contend with career-ruining dirt files being leaked to the media.
Alleged affairs, lovechilds, and photographs of distasteful dress-up party costumes are dug up from nowhere – as well-intentioned lawmakers are forced to bend the knee to the all-powerful pokie lobby.
But with catastrophic domestic violence and suicide rates directly linked to these machines, community pressure is now mounting on venues to do the right thing and fuck the Brickie’s Laptops off for good.
The idea of clubs and pubs taking it upon themselves to free their businesses from these golden handcuffs is unprecedented – but it’s starting to happen.
In an era of beer excise taxes and weekend penalty rates, many hospitality operators have argued that pokie machines are the only way they can stay afloat in the business of serving low effort counter meals with two bartenders and no live music.
However, the Betoota Heights Leagues Club has this week proven that there is a way forward without having to rely on the Reverse ATMs.
“Yeah” says the club’s GM of Operations, Vince Gair.
“Turns out these pilates classes are popular. Incredible margins too. We just provide a good looking South American sheilah and about 40 foam mats. Bit of sanitiser spray and some waterfall noises”
“Spose this is the type of shit a community club should be doing… Ditching the dark VIP rooms and turning them into a bright studio space with some windows”
“It’s weird because we’ve now got young women coming to the joint. Some of these moron footballers in the sports bar might even get a girlfriend”
