INGRID DOULTON | Lady Writer | CONTACT

The unofficial and self-declared office manager of Betoota’s leading conveyancing law firm has been staring at her computer screen in complete silence for roughly three hours now.

Like hundreds of thousands of Taylor Swift fans around the country, Beckathy Lewisham (29) is not doing any work today – or at least until she secures tickets to the long-awaited Era tour.

However, while it is generally accepted that the vast majority of ‘Swifties’ are diehard, these tickets mean more to Beckathy than anyone could know.

There’s stereotypes, and then there’s case studies. This stoic oldest sister of three makes no apologies for adhering to the typecast character traits of Australia’s most obsessive fanbase:

As a former school prefect and vice captain of Betoota Heights Girls High, and a fringe state netballer in the early 2010s, Beckathy would like to call herself a proud feminist but she’s not a big fan of all the sex positivity stuff – and actually thinks women shouldn’t swear.

While she fits the archetypical checkpoints of a tragic Swiftie on paper, there are other factors that make her a little more of a fan than the rest.

A staunch commitment to academics and womens sport in early adulthood means Beckathy has never had any gay friends to console her through the string of messy breakups that followed.

This also means she has been leaning HEAVILY on the bang-on lyricism of Taylor Swift over the years, in her efforts to move on from a bunch of lowlife exes who’s misdemeanours have been recorded and never forgiven in a cardboard box of diaries that she has been keeping since before the debut 2006 self-titled album.

It’s for this reason, she just needs tickets OKAY.

With her knee tapping incessantly under the desk to distract her nervous system from the fact that she very much needs to pee, Beckathy barely even blinks as she stares at the constantly refreshing ticketek page.

With her coworker now suggesting a team catch-up before lunch, there will be one more name on Beckathy’s list of deadbeat men if she misses out on these tickets for a meeting that could’ve been an email.

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