“I Knew I Should Have Worn My Other Band Shirt” Mutters Albo After Reading The News
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactPrime minister Anthony Albanese is now sorely regretting popping on one of his old band to shirts when he disembarked at Sydney airport...
“Joy Division Has Nazi Connotations” Says SuSSan
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Federal Opposition leader SuSSan Ley has this week emerged from the depths of irrelevance by demanding that Prime Minister Anthony Albanese apologise for...
Local Bachelor Keeps Cutlery To A Minimum So The Sheilas Don’t Get Too Comfortable
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local bachelor has this week revealed some of the little tips and tricks he uses to remind women he’s not about to...
18-Year-Old Real Estate Agent May Just Be The Dumbest Cunt You Have Ever Had To Treat Courteously
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIt can be confirmed that a freshly spawned real estate agent may be one of the dumbest cunts to deal with, due to...
Retiree Poised Like A Coiled Spring To Retrieve Bin The Second It’s Been Emptied
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local septuagenarian from Betoota Heights has today taken some time out of his busy schedule to chat to The Betoota Advocate about...
Local Woman Gets Into Spirit Of Halloween By Waiting Until October 31st To Do Her Scary Tax Return
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA woman who’s now well into the ‘owing money’ part of her life as tax payer has decided she’ll leave it to the...
“I Don’t Have A Sweet Tooth” Says Dad Despite Evidence Someone Demolishes The Fruit & Nut After Everyone Has Gone To Bed
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A Betoota Heights man has this week denied having any interest in confectionery or any sugar-based treats despite a...
Piastri Recruits Elderly Neighbour To ‘Blow Lando’s Car To Fucking Sky’ Ahead Of Title Showdown
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The race for the Formula 1 Driver's Championship has just taken a rather interesting turn, it can be confirmed.
Not the type of...
The Block 2026 To Feature Contestants Renovating Shitbox Studios In A Bid To Be More Relatable To The Average Aussie
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactChannel Nine producers have announced that the next season will see contestants battling it out to renovate crumbling studio apartments in a...
Flatmate Ad For Girls Sharehouse Doesn’t Mind A Cheeky Glass Of Wine But Also Values Alone Time
PETE CLARK | Melbourne | CONTACTA sharehouse located in the French Quarter has today uploaded a detailed advertisement for a room that has become available in the ‘stunning’...
