LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
The scales have tragically tipped in favour of the people as Redditors make history by actually achieving something this week.
Over the last few days, Subreddit r/wallstreetbets managed to drive up the share price of US retail chain GameStop making big returns at the expense of billionaire hedge fund managers.
One such hedge fund manager is Orville Van Dandleton (69) who sustained such a massive loss that his accountant team recommended he sell that holiday house he forgot that he owned.
“I have to sell the Majorca before I ever got to learn Spanish,” stated Van Dandleton as he held a block of platinum signed by George W Bush to his head to stop him from overheating.
Van Dandleton says he is just one of nearly tens of billionaires affected by redditors using completely legal means to make money that they were otherwise going to spend on their luxurious lifestyles.
“It’s all gone to kingdom come,” weeped Van Dandleton into the flag of a country that would not otherwise exist without his monetary investment into a previous civil war.
“What’s there to smile about anymore?”