ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The Prime Minister’s Office has attempted to hose down speculation that our reputation and relationship with Europe is in tatters today, telling reporters that the potential Free Trade Agreement with the EU Zone isn’t really necessary in the long run.
Scott Morrison explained that if the United Kingdom, a windswept plague island in the North Atlantic with no petrol, was trucking along fine without a Free Trade Agreement with the EU Zone, which means we will, too.
“I think the old ghosts of parliament that say we’ve irreparably damaged our relationship with the French are overreacting a bit,” said Morrison.
“There’s 40 odd thousand Australians buried in France. Not too many Frenchmen are buried here. I think they need to take into account the historical sacrifices that Australia have made for the French before they start having a huff and puff about not buying their limp-wristed diesel submarines,”
“So perhaps a bit of maturity is needed from all involved, except me, of course. I’m just a salt-of-the-earth Dad from the Shire who, by the grace of God, has been given this test from Him to navigate this very trying time,”
“There’s no better team than me, a lifelong public servant with zero lived experiences, and a former drug squad cop who spent his last day in the force putting cans of dog food in the bin out the back of the station house, to negotiate these submarines and to perform the necessary diplomacy.”
The Advocate reached out to the Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese for comment but it’s grand final week so he’s putting his feet up.
More to come.
