ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Money has never been as cheap as it is now and these days aren’t going to be around forever.

That’s the message from the Reserve Bank today after they kept interest rates where they are until after the election.

RBA Governor Phillip Lowe said he acknowledges that many Australians around the country are struggling at the moment because the cost of living in this country has gone ‘absolutely apeshit’ in recent months and it seems things are only going to get worse and worse until society finally collapses.

“Well,” said Mr Lowe in a telephone call with The Advocate’s financial editor, Sam Khunts Son.

“If you’re struggling at the moment to put food on the table or put E10 in your piece of shit car then perhaps you could get a loan until you sort your life out?”

“Interest rates have never been this low and money is cheap. If you’re currently spending more than you earn, because you’re keeping up with the Jones or maybe because you’re an idiot, then getting another credit card or a personal loan might be the best,”

“The last thing I want to do is raise interest rates and make it harder for people to pay their mortgage. The last thing this country needs is a sub-prime mortgage crisis. God. Can you imagine? Australians are both quite docile but extremely prone to violence, which is a very strange but a very bad combination.”

More to come.


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