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The elderly post-war migrants currently berating each other outside the Hellenic Cafe in Betoota’s Flight Path District appear to be quite measured when compared to the two geriatrics currently debating each other on stage in Cleveland, Ohio.

The argument, which appears to be about something as trivial as whether or not the young kids have it too easy these days, appears to have been going on for close to an hour – with many personal barbs traded each way.

However, this full blown domestic dispute between local papous, Conrad, Spiros, Yanni and Alex outside the GOOD CAFF cafe at 11:30am this morning, actually doesn’t look that bad at all.

Because the two men fighting for the most powerful role in global politics in the US Presidential debate have considerably lowered the bar as to what qualifies as a measured argument.

In Cleveland today, Mr Trump has accused Mr Biden’s son Hunter of crooked deals in an ugly personal blow, while Biden has told the President to ‘shut up’ more than five times.

So far, 40 minutes of the Presidential debate has consisted of nothing more than an inaudible blur of two men talking over each other.

In turn, this hauntingly low standard of democratic discussion has shone a different light on the old codgers ripping into each other outside the local Greek cafe which also serves as somewhat of a retirement.

The target of the spray, Spiros (81) was seen grinning cheesily while being berated by his peers.

“Είσαι ανόητο παλιό galah. Πληρώνετε φόρο σαν ένα skippy!!”shouted an 82-year-old Conrad James, in what appeared to be an abusive spray, before he broke into a grinning laughter with the rest of the cohort, who are yet to acknowledge the state’s 2006 ban on smoking in outdoor eating and drinking areas.

“Είμαι αυτός με το αγγλικό όνομα. Πώς αγοράσατε πολλά αυτοκίνητα για τα εγγόνια σας και μην τα έχετε καταχωρίσει”

At time of press the entire group were seen yelling at each other over a dispute of rules in the same card game they have played outside this cafe for thirty years.

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