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One Australian voter has been sent into fight or flight after catching a glimpse of Liberterian voters handing out how to vote cards at a polling booth.
“They just have that vacant Libertarian look in their eyes, sends shivers up my spine honestly” Said one voter, Tom Hammond (34).
Within a split second of spotting the Libertarians, Tom knew what he had to do.
“Just look down and don’t make any sudden movements and this is all going to be ok” Is what I kept telling myself, Tom explained.
Neville Yort (44), a life long Libertarian, doesn’t get what all the fuss is about.
“Yes, I’ve been told I have a staring problem, but all I’m trying to get through to these bloody drones is that we need to cut all healthcare, fire every council worker, abolish the police and have some rich billionaire sort out the mess… is that so hard for this imbeciles to understand?” Neville said before trying to catch his breath.
Tom says he kept his eyes firmly on the ground and made a B-line for the nearest pensioner handing out Labor flyers.
“I don’t know what it is—maybe it’s the pocket Constitution or the way they linger a bit too long when they smile—but I wasn’t taking any chances.”
At one point, Neville was seen explaining to a confused teenager why traffic lights are a form of soft tyranny.
Despite the eerie energy, the Libertarians say they remain hopeful that this is the year Australians finally reject all forms of governance.
