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Two advertising agencies from some city will be pitted against each other this week on the ABC’s Gruen Transfer where they’ll be challenged to market a Porter apologist to country Queenslanders.
Sam from Colenso Carpet Burns On My Knees-o BD I Have BO, one of the agencies taking part in the challenge, told this masthead that they’re going to take this idea and place it outside of the box.
“Do you remember that ad in New Zealand with the beer and the trucks? Oh yeah, no, you haven’t watched television in New Zealand since you went there for three nights for work seven years ago? Oh, then you probably won’t know what I’m talking about,” said Sam.
“Well, it’s pretty much going to be that but it will be trucks with Scott Morrison’s face on the trucks and we’ll drive all over Queensland and give people beer from the truck. So Queensland,”
“The second half of the ad will just be me saving my carrot while I sit on some bloke’s motorbike in the carpark downstairs.”
In the interest of creating balance for this terrible article, The Advocate decided to speak to the other smooth-brained dork from the agencies who’ll be challenging the boys from Colenso Carpet Burns On My Knees-o BD I Have BO.
His name was Gavin and his button up shirt was at least two sizes too small for him.
Gavin works for Horny Pinatas in Brisbane, which he says is a boutique agency that specialises in charging small businesses large sums of money for services any cunt with half a brain could do with a six-year-old MacBook and a bottle of flat Diet Coke.
“Our concept is heading in the other direction,” he said, furiously scribbling out the beer in the truck idea he had before this interview.
“So we were thinking of paying a Bill Shorten impersonator to fly up there and travel around the towns telling people that he’d going to tax them into poverty because they are too rich. Then, uh, yeah. You know, a tried and tested method,”
“So tune into Gruen tonight, or tomorrow? I’m not actually sure when it’s on. I watch it on iView.”
More to come.
