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A damning new report has confirmed that every single sharehouse looking for a new housemate is, without exception, described as “gorgeous and light-filled.”
The study, conducted by the Betoota Polytechnic School of Rental Realities, analysed over 10,000 listings across Flatmates.com, Facebook groups, and suspiciously vague Instagram stories from people looking to sublet while they’re in Europe.
An overwhelming 98.7% of ads proudly featured the exact same two words: “gorgeous and light-filled.”
Lead researcher Dr Angeline Giles says the data exposes a nationwide epidemic of optimistic gaslighting.
“We saw a listing for a place right above a vape store, complete with mouldy showers and no living room,” Dr Giles explained.
“The ad called it a ‘sunny, peaceful sanctuary for creatives. Gorgeous and light-filled, of course.”
Another listing for a three-bedroom terrace with black mould creeping up the bathroom walls and mushrooms growing through the floorboards confidently described itself as “gorgeous and light-filled,” as well as “queer-friendly, 420-friendly, and filled with plants.”
Patterns also emerged around housemate expectations: no one ever wants just one glass of wine.
“It’s always ‘a glass or two’ and everyone is ‘social but respectful of privacy” Dr Giles explained.
The report also noted a rise in buzzwords like “open-minded” and “respectful” usually alongside rent of around $340 per week plus bills.
One ad in Betoota’s French Quarter recently went viral for promoting a “sun-drenched bedroom” that turned out to be a converted laundry with a skylight and no door.
“Of course it was gorgeous and light-filled,”
More to come.
