PETE CLARK | Melbourne | CONTACT
A local man has today been rocked by a fatal error.
Denniss Smith, was left absolutely shattered, after learning the tablets he purchased to heal his sickness were actually the herbal kind – the ones with zinc and garlic.
Smith said he wasn’t totally opposed to natural remedies before he went to Chemist Warehouse, explaining that he’d ducked into Woollies to grab some lemon and ginger tea and some honey.
But he revealed that he thinks it takes more than just the natural stuff to beat this flu that’s going round.
“After realising the grave error I’d made, my first thought was wow I’m really going to have to raw dog this flu. The only part of being sick that I look forward to is taking those little orange night tablets and dozing off, you just don’t get that from this natural shit,” said Smith.
Smith admitted that in hindsight he should have been a touch more sceptical about the price difference.
“I’m a bit of a cheap skate, I’ll admit it. I couldn’t believe my luck when I saw these bad boys on special for $10, I mean they’re charging an arm and leg for this stuff these days, so I was wrapped.”
It was only once Smith arrived home and got tucked into bed with a tea by his side that he realised the true gravity of the situation.
“I took two of the bloody things, and an hour went by, and I honestly felt worse. I checked the packet and made the grim discovery. The thing is, all the packets nowadays look the same, I think these natural guys are in cahoots with the pseudoephedrine people.”
More to come.
