LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A usually decent member of society jumped down with the dregs today after the sight of his mate walking along the street prompted him to spontaneously hurl abuse at him from his car window.
It was 11:20am when Vet’s assistant Kieran Warmbly (28) was driving through Betoota Ponds, enjoying the scenic drive as he made his way to a property to shoot a horse in the head.
While driving past the Betoota Ponds Shopping & Street Violence Precinct, Warmbly noticed his friend David Bone (27) going about his day buying zucchinis from the local green grocer.
According to onlookers, as soon as Warmbly noticed his mate peacefully going about his day, his window was wound down and abuse was audible.
“Oi Boner ya big [redacted],” yelled Warmbly, who has visited his grandmother five times this month and she isn’t even sick.
“We know what you’re doing with those later mate! Hahaha!”
Bone stated that he was initially a little shaken by the abuse but once he realised it was from someone he knew, it immediately became champagne comedy.
“He got me good, I got to admit that.”
Despite promoting street abuse, Warmbly states he is not a bad person, he is just like every other bonehead who can’t resist becoming the worst the world has to offer when he sees a friend doing nothing offensive.
“I just lost control. He just looked like such an idiot out there, a complete Nigel. It’s like a survival instinct, it just takes over me. Plus, it’s funny as fuck.”
MORE TO COME.
