ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A shameless Betoota Heights man with a Grade I ankle sprain is getting about on a knee scooter because his physiotherapist told him he needed to buy one of his outrageously expensive moonboots to prevent further injury.

When presented the option of using crutches like a normal person or the scooter of shame, Gavin Stick giggled as he made eye contact with his physio and said he’d take the scooter.

His physio, Mike Roger of Remienko Stadium Physiotherapy, said he was disappointed by the decision considering Gavin is an able bodied young man with a decent amount of strength about him.

“He mustn’t have much ticka [sic],” he said.

“Or he doesn’t care about what other blokes think of him. Can you say that these days? Is that an example of toxic masculinity? Laughing at a bloke getting about on a knee scooter? If it is, I’d be that Alexandria Canal down in Sydney! Anyway, I have plenty of women come in here and choose the crutches. Man or woman or whatever’s in between. You can have a base-level of dignity that prevents you from choosing the scooter,”

“Sure, if you’re old and fucked, choosing the scooter is probably best. You know, if you’re an older bloke with a fair gut on you, you’re probably not going to be able to hold yourself up with a set of crutches. Dunno, I’d rather post up at home for a few weeks. With this Gavin bloke, he’s only got a Grade I strain. He could probably just have some ibuprofen and wake up to himself,”

“But don’t listen to me, I’m not a doctor. I’m a physio. But I’m more of a doctor than a chiropractor. Maybe not as much as a dentist. It’s a good spot to be.”

The Advocate reached out to Gavin for comment but have yet to receive a reply.

More to come.

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