LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A local nana has been treated for shock today after accidentally copping a glimpse of a check-out chick’s lower back tattoo.
While doing her fortnightly shop at Betoota Food Nest, nana Abigail Anfold (82) asked check-out worker Kelly Krup (23) if there were any tobacco pouches that had been crumpled and would be sold for a discount.
After Krup rummaged through the lower tobacco drawer, she emerged to discover Nana Abi had collapsed on the floor.
“She seemed fine at first,” stated Krup, who told us her prefered title was ‘check-out chick’ so don’t give us shit in the comments alright.
“She was going on about how she only smokes a pouch a month which she splits with her husband who smokes most of it anyway. Then she stopped talking and I heard this thud like someone had dropped a bunch of wet celery.”
Upon discovering her ailing customer, Krup and her manager dragged Nana Abi outside of the supermarket and called an ambulance.
Although the paramedics would not give an official statement it is believed Nana Abi spent the entire ambulance trip going on about how Krup would regret that tattoo when she got older.
“I know everything these days is ‘f this’ and ‘s that’ but does a nice young lady like that really have to mark her body in such a way?” Nana Abi reportedly asked the paramedics.
“We had a word for women like that back in my day… The word still exists now to be clear but your grand daughters yell at you if you say it.”
The paramedics were then forced to listen to Nana Abi talk about how tattoos used to just be for sailors and Russian prisoners, while they were quietly grateful they wear long sleeves for work.
“Doesn’t she know one day she is going to have wrinkles and lines and spots and flaps of skin and the rest of them. She might feel the same inside but it won’t stop her from looking in the mirror and seeing a stranger. From seeing a woman who went and got too old between blinks.”
“Does she really need a faded oriental symbol above her behind to remind her of who she once was? What happened to a card?”
