LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

It has been confirmed that trying to cut through food or plastic packaging is an absolute fools game when armed with a motel knife.

While on a channel country road trip, the Matherson family checked in to Betoota Shangri-La Springs Motel where mum Juilliane Matherson was keen to try some of the preserves and produce she purchased at the town markets.

However, all the matriarch could get a slice of was cold disappointment as the selection of knives in the motel kitchen were so blunt they may as well be repurposed as tent pegs.

“They were serrated once, you can tell,” stated mother Matherson as crushed a loaf of sourdough trying to cut herself a slice.

“Did a brickie use this to mix cement or something? I think my nan is sharper than this thing and she still thinks Tony Abbott is Prime Minister.”

Management at the Shangri-La Springs state they plan on ‘revamping’ their knife selection after they update the TVs to ones with cordless remote controls and remove the dead possum from the pool.

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